Lorenzo This is a brilliant piece of writing. I was looking for something on your class page that would catch my attention and you title did. I was thinking that the piece of writing would be completly different from what it turned out to be, but I really liked it, I was hooked by the title and it left me wanting to read more and find out more information. I really enjoyed reading this as a google doc - I kind of looked it at a bit funny to start with, I thought it was strange but once you got into the story the google doc form at took the place of paragraphing and that was great. The subject writing was great I enjoyed reading 'dojo' put in your work. Finally the ending made me crack up laughing. I was expecting a fight and when I read the sign part it made me laugh, a great memorale ending. I will share this with some of the boys in my class this afternoon or tomorrow. I am sure that they will love it. Mr Webb and Room Five, Melville Intermediate School, Hamilton, Waikato. melvilleroom8.blogspot.com
Lorenzo
ReplyDeleteThis is a brilliant piece of writing. I was looking for something on your class page that would catch my attention and you title did. I was thinking that the piece of writing would be completly different from what it turned out to be, but I really liked it, I was hooked by the title and it left me wanting to read more and find out more information. I really enjoyed reading this as a google doc - I kind of looked it at a bit funny to start with, I thought it was strange but once you got into the story the google doc form at took the place of paragraphing and that was great. The subject writing was great I enjoyed reading 'dojo' put in your work. Finally the ending made me crack up laughing. I was expecting a fight and when I read the sign part it made me laugh, a great memorale ending. I will share this with some of the boys in my class this afternoon or tomorrow. I am sure that they will love it.
Mr Webb and Room Five, Melville Intermediate School, Hamilton, Waikato. melvilleroom8.blogspot.com